Sept. 11 Victim Helped Poor on the Sly

N E W  Y O R K, Dec. 24, 2001 -- Brendan Ryan and Kristy Irvine seemed to have a fairy tale life in the making.

Soul mates since the age of 12, they had literally grown up together in Huntington, Long Island. Somehow they knew even at a young age that they were meant for each other. Ryan, 30, remembers admiring Irvine even when he was just a boy.

"Her beauty her serenity, the way that the shoe just fit the foot," Ryan said.In high school, Kristy's older sister saw something between the two after their prom.

"I thought, 'Wow what a gorgeous couple' ... it just took my breath away," her sister, Kerry Irvine told Good Morning America.

A Love Story

In high school, Ryan and Irvine stuck to being just friends, with sort of a "Sam and Diane from Cheers relationship," Ryan said.

In college, though, Irvine used to say "I'm going to marry Brendan Ryan," her friend Meredith O'Neal Hassett said. "And I was like 'but you're not even dating him.' She was like 'I just know ... I know I am'."

She was right. When it was time to begin adult life, Ryan and Irvine both realized that they should be together. Last June, they got married in storybook fashion. Hassett recalls that when the wrong flowers arrived on her wedding day, Irvine was characteristically gracious about the mistake.

"She was like 'oh well, I like these ones better'," Hassett said. "And what bride could really be like that?"

Tragedy Strikes Happy Couple

The couple's happily ever after lasted only three months and one day. Kristy Irvine Ryan worked as an equities trader with Sandler O'Neill & Partners on the 104th floor of the World Trade Center.

Chris Francescani, a Good Morning America producer and friend of the couple, said it is hard to watch his friend Ryan suffer.

"It's devastating to watch someone you know so well hurt so much and carry such a heavy burden," he said. "He loves Kristy. He absolutely loves Kristy ... maybe now more than ever."

On the morning of Sept. 11, Kristy called her husband and said that the fire from the first tower was contained and her building, tower two, was safe. When the second plane hit, they were still on the phone.

"I heard her voice. and I just said 'I love you' and then the phone went out," Ryan said.

Kristy is the fourth of five girls in her family. One of her sisters who also lives in New York waited in vain for her sister to emerge from the burning office tower.

"I waited on Fifth Avenue," her older sister, Kerry Irvine, said. "And I waited for her to come walking up the street with ashes on her or something, and my hope got lower and lower."

The struggle to deal with her loss continues.

"I feel really lost without her and really weak and getting out of bed is a big deal," she said. "I want to feel strong and try to pretend it for other people."

Her friend, Meredith Hassett, said Irvine's spirit will help her get through the tragedy.

"I will survive this and I will live through this and someday be happy again because of her," Hassett said.

A Legacy of Charity

Hassett, along with Brendan Ryan and Kerry Irvine, are remembering Kristy this time of year because of an event that captured the very essence of her spirit, and changed all four of them forever.

Just before Christmas time three years ago, Hassett was teaching elementary school in Harlem and was particularly concerned about a student and his struggling single mother, Belquiz Estrill.

They had no money for furniture, or even pots and pans, let alone gifts. It wasn't going to be a merry Christmas.

Hassett told the mother that all she had to do was write a letter indicating what the family needed, and that she would get it to a "bank charity" that she knew of.

Banking on Friendship

The only "charity" she was really counting on was the goodwill of her friends, and her best friend Kristy was the first one she called. Kristy was excited about the ruse, and soon enlisted the help of Ryan and her sister, Kerry.

The four of them bought presents and the morning before Christmas Eve, they brought a car full of gifts to Estrill and her son. Hassett hid as the gifts were delivered, to keep up the "bank charity" ruse. Meanwhile, the other three knocked on the door, and posed as bank representatives as they gave Estrill their armloads of gifts.

"My son had a great smile on his face when he saw all of the gifts, a lot of stuff came to my house," Estrill recalled.

The group of friends felt great about what they had done, and Kristy said that they should continue doing it.

Three years later, the charity, Secret Smiles (www.secretsmiles.org) has helped 50 New York families. Now, it will include families who were impacted by the Sept. 11 attacks. Her friends, and her family, know that Kristy would want them to keep giving to others, in her memory.