The summer dilemma facing working parents: The struggle to balance freedom, childcare and rising costs
The "feral summer" trend is challenging for working parents.
As children celebrate the end of the school year, parents across the country are scrambling to piece together summer camps, childcare, vacation days and flexible work arrangements to cover the roughly 10 weeks when school is out.
The annual challenge has taken on new visibility this year amid a social media trend celebrating the idea of a more unstructured, "feral" or "'90s-style" summer, one filled with bike rides, neighborhood adventures and long stretches of unscheduled time.
But while many parents say they love the idea, the reality is often far more complicated.
Jessica Martin, a New York mother of two who works full-time in marketing, said for her family, summer planning begins months before school lets out.
"It's spreadsheets, waitlists and figuring out coverage week by week," she said. "I want my kids to have those carefree summer memories, but the reality is, I still have meetings and deadlines."
The idea of a less structured summer has gained traction online as parents push back against overscheduling and the pressure to fill every hour of a child's day with activities.
Parents say they miss the freedom they experienced growing up and want their children to have similar opportunities for independence and downtime.
"I absolutely love the idea of giving my kids the kind of summer I had," said Lauren Peterson, a Connecticut mother of three who works remotely in human resources.
"I remember leaving the house after breakfast, riding bikes with friends and not coming home until dinner," she said. "But the reality is that my husband and I both work full time, so someone still has to make sure our kids are supervised while we're on Zoom calls."
Peterson said she tries to strike a balance by scheduling camps for part of the summer, while intentionally leaving some days open.
"I don't think kids need every minute planned," she said. "But for a lot of working parents, a completely carefree summer just isn't an option."
A seasonal challenge that exposes a year-round problem
The idea of a less structured summer has gained traction online as parents push back against overscheduling and the pressure to fill every hour of a child's day with activities.
Many parents say they miss the freedom they experienced growing up and want their children to have similar opportunities for independence and downtime.
But for millions of families, summer is less about nostalgia and more about logistics.
A record share of American households now rely on two working parents. A recent Pew Research Center analysis of Census Bureau data showed 52% of two-parent families with children had both parents working full time. At the same time, more than 10 million children live in single-parent households, the vast majority headed by mothers, according to 2022 Census Bureau data.
The financial challenges are significant. Child care remains one of the largest expenses many families face, with infant care averaging more than $18,000 annually nationwide, according to U.S. Labor Department data from 2018, adjusted for inflation.
Reshma Saujani, founder of Moms First and Girls Who Code and star and executive producer of the new film "No Country for Mothers," told ABC News that social media trends can sometimes overlook those realities. While some families may be able to embrace a more relaxed summer schedule, she said many others simply don't have that option.
"Right now, families across the country are struggling to find childcare for when school is out," she said. "Sitting around their kitchen tables praying the math adds up for summer camp this year. Hoping they get the call that their kid is off the waitlist and they don't have to send that email or have that awkward conversation with their boss."
Instead of focusing on individual parenting choices, Saujani believes policymakers should address the systems that make balancing work and family so difficult.
"Childcare is the linchpin of affordability," she said. "You change that lever, make that affordable, and it changes everything."
She pointed to recent investments in childcare in states like New Mexico, New York and Vermont as examples of policies that could make a meaningful difference for families.
"Pass paid family leave and invest seriously in affordable childcare, not as a favor to moms, but as a basic economic necessity," she said.
Until then, many working parents will continue spending summers walking the same tightrope: trying to give their children the freedom and joy that define childhood while navigating a childcare system that often leaves little room for either.
"The goal of parenting should be freedom and choice," Saujani said. "Most parents aren't asking for perfection. They're asking for a fighting chance."
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